Your mind is magnificent. It’s a goal-seeking system. It loves to deliver. It’s only got one problem: You! Operator error gets in the way of more dreams unfulfilled, more relationships broken, and more disappointment than I can count. Good news… this is curable.
You see, your mind needs a target, a focus, something to aim for. Then, when this is achieved, it looks, naturally, for support from your neural net. It needs all of your patterns of thought singing from the same songsheet!
Here’s what too often happens. Goal: I want that job. Here’s the opportunity to frame the goal or to build fences in front of it – hindering its achievement. Too often we build fences:
- There are too many other people going for that job
- I’m not qualified
- I lack confidence
- They probably won’t even call me to interview
What is your poor mind going to do with such incongruence? The answer is simple: it will be totally confused and you’ll get nowhere.
“Frames” are so much more up-market than “fences”. The right frame can double the price of a print. In fact we even talk about our “frame of mind” or being “in the right frame of mind”.
Let’s take each of the fences we’ve built and transform them into a frame. Personally I find each of the statements an offence to my goal.
“There are too many other people going for that job” – reframed as “so if I get it, it will be a massive boost to my confidence – hey, if I only get to be invited to an interview that’ll be a sure sign that I’m heading in the right direction!”
“I’m not qualified” – reframed as “but I am massively more experienced and therefore more suitable than anybody else I can think of for this job”.
“I lack confidence” – reframed as “and the only way to build more confidence is to get some wins under my belt. In this situation, being called to interview would be the first ‘win’ for me…”
“They probably won’t even call me to interview” – reframed as “and if they don’t they’ll have good reason. If I then become the one in one hundred applicants who asks for honest feedback, I’ll find out what I could do to improve my chances next time!”
Give your brain a break, your mind a massage, and make sure your frame of mind is congruent with and draws focus to your goal. If you thought cause offence to your goal, you can be sure that you’re building fences not making frames.
Remember that every certificate of achievement deserves a good frame… not a fence!